i Found A Way
by FireBehindPain
Summary: "Baby nobody's gonna love you like I do." His calm voice slurred due to the many beers he's had. "You know that?" His grip tightened around my shoulders. Tears slowly feel down my flushed cheeks as I stayed there on his lap. My eyes quickly scanned the room looking for some kind of self-defense. I saw the knife from earlier. I wanted to get it so bad, but my body wouldn't move.
1. 1: Damsel In Distress

**I DO NOT OWN TMNT AND ANY OF THEY'RE CHARCTERS. HOW EVER, I DO OWN ERIN FIELDS. MHM. YEAH. READ, REVIEW…EAT A TACO. DO WHATEVER! HAVE FUN(:**

**Chapter One: Damsel In Distress**

"Baby nobody's gonna love you like I do." His calm voice slurred due to the many beers he's had. "You know that?" His grip tightened around my shoulders.

Tears slowly feel down my flushed cheeks as I stayed there on his lap. My eyes quickly scanned the room looking for some kind of self-defense. I saw the knife from earlier. I wanted to get it so bad, but my body wouldn't move.

"I SAID DO YOU KNOW THAT!" His voice got louder as he pushed me off.

I fell down on my hands and knees and quickly crawled away. I grabbed the knife and stood there shaking. In that moment I felt helpless even with a knife. I was very positive I was going to die, and there was nothing I could do about it.

"Put the fucking knife down." He laughed making his way slowly towards me. His hand trailed the edge of the table and knocked off one of the wine glasses.

I jumped, and took a shaky breath. I could hear my heart pounding in my chest, and could feel the sweat that flowed down my forehead. With each step he took, I moved the other direction. "Derick, stay…away…from me."

His brown eyes filled with laughter. He ran his fingers through his chestnut brown hair and cocked his head to the side as he gritted his teeth, "Stay away from you?" He took another drink of his beer and wiped his mouth. "You don't mean that baby." Derick motioned me to come closer and to work things out with him. I knew I shouldn't have went back…but I did.

He took me in his arms and stroked my long black hair. My tears cam harder, and I could hardly breath. That's when he made his move. He grabbed my neck and stared at me with those uncaring eyes. His glare was asking me to die. I tried to gasp for air but I couldn't. Finally, I had the courage to stab him. It was one quick hit to the leg and the side. Hitting the ground hard while he bled, I grabbed a few things and ran out the door. I couldn't go far in heels. But I made it to a store called 'Second Time Around'. I knocked on the door looking in every direction hoping he didn't follow me. A tall red head came running down the stairs, she looked at me and I just stared like a deer caught in headlights.

"Hold on." She quickly opened the door and I rushed in shamefully.

"I'm sorry. I have no where to go." I cried with his blood on my hands. "I stabbed him…I finally stabbed him." It's like Niagra Falls had been released. My eyes were so flooded I couldn't see.

The lady before me was frightened and unsure. But she took me up to her apartment. She offered me a shower and afterwards I was to offer her why my hands were bloody. I let my dress fall to the floor, and quickly turned on the water. The steam rose around me as I let the water wash off my sins. It felt peaceful to take a shower and not have to worry about getting dragged out by my hair. The Shampoo flowed down my body and down the drain. I just felt so free for those moments. I got out, dried off, and put on the clothes she offered me. It was a purple crop top with black sweat pants…wasn't my style. But she was willing to help a hurt soul. I looked into the mirror. I needed to start over. I rummaged through the cabinets till I found Hydrogen Peroxide and a spray bottle. I dumped whatever it was down the sink, and poured the Peroxide in it. I grabbed the pair of scissors and cropped my hair…then I proceeded to bleach it. I sprayed the Peroxide all over my hair, but still leaving a sense of black strands underneath. I put the toilet seat down and waited thirty minutes. My hair had bleached. I finished it up by rinsing my hair with cold water and conditioner. I smiled at my new look, I felt like a different person. Although I was still trapped in my old body.

"April?" I peeked around the corner looking, and there she was with another guy and four mutant turtles. I stopped in my tracks. The first one to make eye contact with me was one with a red bandanna. His gaze sent a warning side through me…like it was telling me to stay away. So, for that moment I did. The other three were very welcoming.

"Hi! I'm Michelangelo…call me Mikey!" The Orange one was very straightforward. He tripped over his own two feet trying to get to me.

I was a little cautious. My face didn't hide anything. It was completely flushed, and I was completely scared.

"Michelangelo!" The blue one firmly stated.

The turtle moved back from me slightly frowning.

"Give her space." He uncrossed his arms and approached me slowly. "My name is Leonardo." He smiled showing straight teeth. He then pointed towards the still frowning turtle, "That is Michelangelo. But you can call him Mikey." He moved his finger towards one with a purple bandanna, "That's Donatello. Prefers Donnie or Don." Then his thumb motioned towards the one that had that glare. He was casually leaning up against the wall. His body language was saying dangerous and wild. Those are two combinations that I didn't want at the moment. "Don't mind him. That's Raphael…but call him Raph."

I remained voiceless as I studied each individual turtle.

"Ya gonna tell us ya name princess." Raphael barked still remaining relaxed.

"My name is Erin Fields…" I just looked at the turtle, his Brooklyn accent was thick…but I liked it. I was trying to figure him out more than the others…but he was unreadable.

"So, how'd ya get 'ere Erin."

"I…I…uhh…" I didn't know what to say. I was about to open my mouth when the purple one rushed at me.

"Your injuries..can I take care of them?" He asked giving me a very believable and trusting smile.

I slowly nodded my head, and watched as he opened a kit and began fixing me up.

"Where'd ya get your injuries?"

"That's enough Raphael! She will answer when she's good and ready!" Leonardo snapped at his brother.

"What da hell! It was a simple fuckin' question that coulda had a simple fucking ansuh." His attitude immediately turned into anger, causing his accent to be heavier than normal.

"Watch your language! And knock off the attitude!"

The both were at each others necks. I couldn't watch it any longer. "I fell!" I screamed my loudest capturing everyone's attention. "I…uh…fell down." I mentally kicked myself that was the worst lie I could've thought of.

"You fell?" the one tending to my injuries asked...I already knew him and Leo could see through my lie.

"Yeah. I fell." I calmly replied not making eye contact. My sad brown eyes stayed pinned to the ground.

"You must have fell pretty hard…cause the injuries I'm tending to aren't close to the story you gave me."

I shook my head no. I didn't want to be made fun of for being weak. "I…fell…" I took my left arm and wiped my nose.

"If that's where you want to leave it. Ok then." Donatello bandaged the last cut up, and looked up at his other brothers. I knew April had told them I stabbed someone…I was surprised when they didn't continuously hound me.

"Wasn't your hair just black?" April raised an eyebrow.

"I decided to go for a new look." I nervously laughed.

I could feel Raphael's glare. I didn't need to see it to know he was giving me one. I shifted uncomfortably as Leonardo then approached me.

"Erin, do you have anywhere to stay?" His voice was so soothing, I closed my eyes and listened to it.

"No…I don't." I replied slowly opening my eyes to meet his ocean blue's.

"Raphael blind fold her. You can come stay with us." The last thing I saw was Raphael coming towards me and Leonardo walking away.

The whole way out to where ever we're going I was being held. My guess was by Raphael…who ever it was they were very muscular and firm. At first I wasn't so easy. But then, I let my head rest on his shoulder. I squirmed around until I was comfortable.

"Awe Raphie she likes you!" I could hear Mikey's voice calling from the front.

I guess they thought I was sleeping…but I could hear every thing they were saying.

"Want your ass kicked Mikey?" His question resulted in Mikey keeping his comments to himself.

I let out a faint smile at the two. I could feel Raphael's head shift down and look at me. I wonder what he was thinking or if he was even smiling.

"How much farther dudes this guckey bag is heavyyyyyy." Mikey whined.

"Uh, Mikey it's pronounced Gucci and please don't get that dirty it was a pretty penny thank you." I responded a hint of sass.

"Ohhh, we got a sassy one 'ere." Raphael teased as my cheeks burned with red.

I heard a door open and close, then I was put down and unblindfolded, Mikey set my bag on the ground and I let out a small squeal that startled the bunch. "No, that is name brand we don't do that." I grabbed my bag and sat it on the table.

"Name brand?" Mikey asked a little freaked out about my reaction over a bag. "Here's a good question. How much did that thing cost?"

"About one thousand four hundred…why?" I asked as all three of they're jaw dropped open.

"And Where'd ya get that kinda money?" Raphael leaned closer to me a little curious in my answer.

"I'm a model."

Raphael looked me up and down…I can't lie I felt so violated. His stare was focused on me until a giant rat broke it.

"My sons, Leonardo has warned me that we are in presence of a guest." He then spotted me and smiled. "My friend, I am Master Splinter. I see that you have already met my sons. What brings you here and please your name?"

"My name is Erin Fields and I have no where to stay…your sons offered me here. If that is no trouble?" I asked showing him the respect they did.

"Not at all my child." His voice went from a soothing ocean to a raging storm. "Raphael please see to it that Miss Erin is comfortable, ass he will be staying in your room."

"Where da hell am I 'pose to sleep Sensei!?"

"Raphael your mouth! And the couch…where else." He laughed then shuffling away.

The rogue turtle let out a faint growl and started up the stairs. I looked at the others then followed him. The whole walk up was quiet, and the whole walk pass the other rooms were also quiet. I played with my finger until he stopped. But of course I wasn't paying attention so my fragile body bumped right into his hard shell.

"Watch where your walkin' princess." He opened the room and showed me around. His tour basically concluded with don't touch nothing.

"Thank you for letting me stay." I was trying to be friendly with the angry creature.

"Ehh, don't thank me. Thank Fearless. I could careless where ya stay tonight." He turned his shoulder and left me standing there. He was so angry I could feel it. He suffocated me when he came into a room, but it was a different feeling. It wasn't like Derick's. Raphael's was filled with empty threats, where Derick's weren't close to empty.

I climbed under the black blanket and laid there thinking about everything. But my biggest though was how I was going to tell the guys about Derick. My eyes became heavy and soon my body gave up, I let sleep win.


	2. 2: His Touch Has Truth

**Chapter 2: His Touch Has Truth**

My body was heavy. I'm guessing from all my injuries yesterday. I tried to sit up but there was no luck. Once again, I couldn't help myself. I wanted so badly to get one of the guys, but at the same time they deserved they're sleep. I deserved to be dead. What was the purpose of living if your always helpless against everything thrown your way. Why was I born? To be someone's guinea Pig? I shifted onto my side and curled up into a ball.

"Could life be any worse for me right now?"

"Well yeah dudette…but why worry about what could be wrong, when you could think about what went right."

My head peeked over my shoulder to see Mikey standing there with a bowl of cereal and a glass of orange juice.

"Sorry, but I kinda figured you were hungry." He sat the food on a nightstand beside my bed, well technically Raphael's bed.

"Thank you Mikey."

He noticed how hard it was for me to move. He slid his arm under me and demanded me to shift my full weight onto him. Mikey easily pulled me to an upright position. I couldn't help but smile, his face was so child-like.

"Sorry for Raph's attitude. He's always like that. It's kind of normal around here." Mikey laughed before sitting on the edge of the bed.

I waved it off. He couldn't always be like that…could he? I finished up the last bit and was determined to get up. I closed my eyes and swung my feet off the bed…tried pushing up, but a huge force pushed me back down.

I jumped to conclusions, "Mikey what are you doing! I can stand uuu…." I soon saw who was before me, and as you could guess my words drifted off.

"Donnie didn't really say how long it'd be before ya could stand." His eyes beamed down on me and I squirmed a little. "Here let me go ask 'im…" He shifted on his heel and turned away disappearing.

I just looked at Mikey who gave me an unsure shrug. I let out a faint sigh and let me shoulders slump in the process. A couple minutes passed of complete silence and Raphael came back with Donatello.

"So, Doctor Donnie, how long is it until Erin ova 'ere can get on 'er feet?"

"Well…she was hurt pretty bad. It wasn't just cut and bruises…so by my calculations…"

Don stood there drawing letters and numbers in the air. I tried to keep up, but he was far too smart. I just sat back and waited for the worst response ever.

"Two weeks." Don smiled trying to sugar coat it.

"Two weeks!? I have to go to Paris today for a shoot! I can't just cancel it! I'm already going to get heat for chopping my hair and dying it!" My whole world was crushed. If I couldn't model…I had nothing.

"The only way you could go is if you had one of us with you…but we're mutant turtles…" Donnie stroked his chin as he went into a deep thought. "But…you know. I have been working on some things." He looked over at Raphael and motioned him to follow.

I ran my fingers through my messy hair before inspecting myself. "What's going on Mikey?" I asked contently looking at my healing cuts.

"I don't think Donnie would want me spilling his geekology dudette." Mikey bit his lip.

His body language was sorry. I focused on him, reading him. I could tell he wasn't good at keeping secrets. A couple minutes walked by and Donatello walked in with some guy I've never seen before. And by Mikey's reaction he'd never seen him either. I'm not gonna lie, he was hot. The man had had a lot of muscle and was wearing a red t-shirt that showed every muscle and every line on his body. Over top was a black leather jacket. His jeans were a dark grey, and his shoes were black like his jacket. His skin color was the perfect tan and his hair color was a chestnut brown and it was cut in the style of a crew cut. But the one thing that set me off the edge, was his dark amber eyes and that smirk he stood there with as his arms were crossed firmly over his chest.

"INTRUDER!" Mikey screamed whirling out his nunchucks!

"Don't think about touchin' me." The man before us cracked his knuckles, and his neck.

"Raphael?" I asked pushing myself to get a closer look. Mikey willingly helped me up.

Our faces were mere inches away from each other. I observed him, and then my cheeks turned red…realizing I called him hot. He moved back a couple steps and looked in the other direction.

"Listen, no need ta stare. I know I'm hot." His eyes looked at me from the corners as he enjoyed my reaction to his joke.

"Donnie, how did yo-" I was cut off thanks to the brains.

"I couldn't really explain. But I was able to turn any of us human through the watch you see on his wrist." Donatello pointed to the red watch. "As long as he has that, he's human. And this is how you'll get to your jobs."

That lit something under Raphael, cause he wasn't too happy. "Ohhhh noooo. I am NOT takin' 'er to 'er fuckin' modeling events. Forget it. Make Mikey go."

"Mikey has to work on his skills. I'm still working on the security systems, and Leo has better things to do."

"Ya owe me big time for dis Donnie." He then turned to me and picked me up.

It was awkward if you ask me cause my legs were wrapped around him and my arms were around his neck. I blushed so hard. I felt his heat radiating off of him and it wrapped me in a safe blanket. I was in a trans…I wanted so badly to get out of but I couldn't. I just laid my head against his chest and sat there until we made it to the bathroom. He drew the bath water and gathered the shampoo, conditioner, towel, and etc. I raised an eyebrow. There was no way in hell I was going to get undressed with him here. He turned and saw the expression on my face.

"I know what your thinking an' no I ain't gonna sit here and help ya get undressed…" He then moved me closer to the tub. "I got betta things ta do." He walked out before closing the door he peeked back in smiling. "Have fun."

"WAIT!" I screamed so desperately. "Can you go into my bag and get me some clothes for the shoot." I began to slide my pants off and that's when he slammed the door shut.

It took a couple minutes but I was able to slink into the warmth of the bath. I felt my whole body relax, and caught myself thinking that it was similar to Raphael's body heat.

'What are you doing? He's a turtle…you're a human. Get it together!' I thought as I sunk to my nose under the water. I cupped some water in my hands and poured it over my hair letting it all run down. 'His human form is so hot! And that Brooklyn accent sends you off the edge!' I wanted to punch myself in the head so bad. Why am I even thinking about him! I grabbed the shampoo and massaged it through my hair.

"Knock. Knock."

I heard from the other side of the door. I didn't know what to do. I knew it was Raphael with my clothes.

"Come…in?" I was so uneasy about him seeing my like this. But to my surprise he had enough respect to close his eyes as he made his way to the toilet. He closed the seat and set the clothes on top. Then walked out.

I just sat there contemplating everything. Especially Derrick's next move…he usually knows where I need to go for my shots, and I knew he'd know about today. I'm just hoping that a prayer works that he won't show up. Then moments later another knock tore through my thoughts again….

"Erin, your phone keeps uhh buzzin' an' I dunno what it wants…"

"Is it a text message Raphael?" I screamed out trying to finish conditioning my hair.

"Yeah, it says I'll be here in ten be ready to catch ya flight."

"SHIT!" I screamed trying to jump out of the shower. I slipped and fell hitting the floor. At that moment I couldn't even try to get back up.

Raphael rushed in not in anyway trying to cover his eyes. He picked me up off the floor, pushed everything off the toilet cover and sat me there. He then realized I was naked.

"Uhmmm, I'm just gonna.." He sheepishly replied before running out.

I let my head fall into my hands. I felt so stupid. But I couldn't feel sorry for long…Spencer was almost near. (S/N: Spencer is the limo driver..) I put on my violet purple strapless, but had to wait for Raphael to zip it up. Then I slipped on my heels. They were more than one color. Orange, blue, white, red, and violet covered my heels. I then brushed my hair and scrunched it up…I was hoping on the plane it'd dry.

"Raphael!" I screeched trying to zip it up, but there was no progress.

"Want me to come in?"

"Yeah! I'm dressed. I need help zipping the damn zipper."

He let out a small laugh while zipping the zipper. Chills ran up and down my spine. His laugh just got me…it was so mischievous. "What's so funny?" I raised an eyebrow before grabbing my shades and holding my arms out.

"Shit. I forgot I gotta carry your ass…" Raphael mumbled before picking me up bridal style and heading out. "Where da hell are we even goin'?"

"April's. I told Spencer to pick us up there." I looked up at his eyes only to melt in his arms completely.

"Dat's not far." He kept walking realizing all the people staring at us. I could hear a growl escape from his mouth, and his body language became frustrated.

"Why do you get angry so easily?" I wanted to take his mind off of them, but I think maybe the question I asked wasn't really off topic.

He just grunted and continued his way through the streets. He was so moody…more than a girl on her period. I just dismissed his behavior and looked to see Spencer waiting for us. I smiled as Raphael slid me all the way across before he got in himself.

"Who's your friend and does Derrick know about him?" His high prissy voice asked as he looked up in the rearview window winking at me.

"Who's Derrick?" Raphael quickly came out of his slump, as he looked at me with an eyebrow raised.

"Uhh, no one." I didn't want to talk about him…ever. "An old friend."

"An old friend alright…" Spencer joked. My eyes quickly adjusted to daggers and shot a look that could scare even Raphael.

I looked out of the corner of my eye knowing Raphael didn't believe me for one minute. He put his pointer finger up signaling one minute and put the tinted window up between us and the driver.

"Ya gonna tell me who Derrick really is?" He asked firmly crossing his arms. "Or am I gonna have ta find 'im myself." He leaned in closer to me.

I was trapped between his body and the door. I thought about opening the door and rolling out, but there was no way I was gonna ruin this dress. My breathing shortened as a smile spread out across his face. I tried to form words but nothing came out.

He then whispered in my ear, "Ya gonna ansa princess?"

I shuddered in his presence, and I know he knew it. He started to get closer and brushed his lips against the lobe of my ear. "Tell me.." He whispered.

"He's…uhhh…" I couldn't think straight, not with him close to me. His hand slowly rested on my leg, and that's when I broke. "He's my husband…" Raphael didn't react like I thought he would, I suppose he wanted more information. And I was right.

"Why ain't ya with 'im?" His fingers playfully slid up and down my leg.

I kept my mouth shut until his other hand pulled me in closer. Our noses were touching, and his amber eyes were like a fireplace. They were dangerous but pleasant.

"He's…abusive…" I whispered. Raphael buried his face into my neck, and I folded. "I stabbed him…and ran…" That's when Raphael moved away.

I could see he was ready to kill someone. "If I eva catch 'im….ya might just wanna call the cops…cause I might kill da bastard!" His teeth started to grind and his whole body tensed up. He then rolled the window down revealing Spencer.

"You guys were back there awful long time.." Spencer joked pulling up to a curb.

"Hey, Spencer…." Spencer looked in the rearview to see Raphael talking to him. "Shut da fuck up."


	3. 3: Altercation

**I forgot that lines in the pages are scene changes .. so yeah . Lol & THANK YOU FOR THE REVIEWS ! SHOUTOUT TO **anime-zombie14 .

**YOU'RE AWESOME ! THANKS FOR THE REVIEW ! YOUR MY NEW BUDD !(: & THANKS TO GUEST .. who ever that is . Don't know your name .. but thank you ! **

**Enjoy this chapter !(:  
**

**Chapter 3:**

There I was in Paris, sitting and having make-up thrown all over me.

"My darling, you need to get away from Derrick, he's simply tearing you apart." Mama Jace said as she spread blush across my face.

I didn't say a word, I didn't want to. I know my Chaperone, Raphael, could see how bothered I was. But he just sat there…thinking.

"Derrick is getting better." I finally answered.

"If only that was true…" She responded before putting a light lip-gloss over my lips.

I wanted to cry, just break down and leave. But this money was my source of income and I was thinking about buying each of the guys something as a thank you to them. Even though this is my second day of knowing them, they still helped me by giving me a place to stay. They all had they're own effect on me. Mikey can help me smile, Leo always listens, Donnie make's sure all my injuries are ok and he also does daily check-ups for everyone, and Raphael…well, I haven't figured him out yet. I wasn't even close to seeing behind his high wall he had built up around him. He was the hardest out of all of them to read.

"Can we just get this done?" My voice had worry in it and Mama Jace could tell.

Her tired-some smile seemed to find it's way across her face, as she tucked a piece of her white hair behind her ear. "He won't come." She then helped me up and gave me a light hug.

"Mama Jace…I can't stand. Doctor's orders…" I said before she could release the hug.

"Well, what are we to do? They wanted you to stand on the balcony…" She let out a sigh of disappointment.

I smiled and pulled her closer to me so I could whisper in her ear. What I had told her was going to be a funny scene. Mama Jace grabbed all her materials and utensils and made her way over to Raphael. I just sat watching his reaction to twenty people trying to do his hair and make-up.

"Get da hell away from me!" He screamed pushing everyone away. He then approached me. He was mad, I was sure of that. "Whaddya think your doin'?"

"I think my modeling partner better get ready." I laughed pointing as I could see Jeffery was ready to take some shots.

"There is NO way in hell I'm goin' ta model." He snoodly tried to wipe off his make-up but nobody told him he needed water to do that.

"Yes you are! This pretty girl can't stand…now what your gonna do is let her lean against you on the balcony." Mama Jace firmly poked her finger at him.

Raphael leaned down getting to her level. "Bite…me."

Mama Jace never backed down, and she wasn't about to. "Moochie!" She yelled.

I looked behind Raphael and saw her little brown colored Pomerainean speeding up behind him. I let out a faint laugh, which caused him to give me the look he gives Mikey. I ignored it, and continued to giggle. Next thing you know Raphael jumped. Moochie kept biting at his heels, and Raphael didn't like it.

"Knock it of ya rat!" He growled.

He went to pick up the pooch, but Moochie kept snapping at him. I thought it was funny.

"Erin, ya wanna get ya friend's rat!" His Amber eyes started to burn with fire.

I shifted uncomfortably and just looked up at Mama Jace begging her to stop.

"I will not call him off, until you agree to model with this pretty young lady."

"Fine! I'll fuckin' do it…but ya owe me lata." Raphael picked me up disgusted and walked over in front of all the camera's and people.

Jeffrey smiled at us adjusting his tie. "Alright! What's the young gentlemen's name?"

"What's it to ya?" Raphael mumbled under his breath.

I decided I'd answer all the questions and he'd just do what was told. "Raphael." I observed that after saying his name my stomach felt weird. Like it was being tied up in knots of some sort.

"Well Raphael.." Jeffery said his name with disgust. I heard Raphael growl and could feel his chest rumble. I looked up at him and laughed. "Your going to have your back leaned up against the balcony railing, and Erin is going to lean on you. Now emotions wise, I need you both to act like your going to kiss each other. I wanna see the fire! The passion! The heat!"

Raphael wasn't nearly calmed down. He was still angry, and I don't know how. But I could feel it. He glared as Jeffery before positioning both of us. "Oh your gonna see da fire!"

I gently smacked him in the chest, catching his attention. "Raphael.." I whispered his name trying to put an angry pitch behind it. He just rolled his eyes and was trying to give Jeffery what he wanted.

I leaned against Raphael, with my hands on his chest I looked up at him pleadingly, he had one arm around my waist and the other lay out across the railing. His expression wasn't much…he just looked away with his usual attitude. But when I peeked out of the corner of my eye, Jeffery loved it…so I played along. Flashes surrounded us and Jeffery's screams and comments.

"Change!" Jeffery screamed.

I knew what that meant so I switched positions. I had my back to his chest and held onto the railing for support. He grabbed my hips and pulled me closer to him and he dug his face into my neck. I felt so…weak. It felt how I did when we were back in the car. But I just brushed it off. It probably was just the energy and chemistry we were having in the photo shoot. We took about five more before taking a break.

"Dat was uncomfortable…" Raphael helped me over to the refreshments table.

I just laughed and reached for a bottle of spring water when my wrist was grabbed.

"Thought you could get away from me babe?"

That voice. I knew it. I was so scared. My eyes grew bigger, and I froze up.

"Derrick.." I whispered before he grabbed me and pulled me closer. I could smell every ounce of alcohol on his breath. It made me cringe. I wanted to puke.

"Aye…why don' ya let her go an' be on your way…" Raphael hissed pushing him away from me.

He stumbled back due to the increased alcohol in his system. "Who the fuck are you?" He asked slurring his words while he poked his finger into Raphael's chest. "And what the fuck are you gonna do…about it?"

Those were the words he'd been waiting to hear. He rolled up his sleeves with a cocky grin and winked at me before knocking Derrick in the jaw. I gasped as he went crashing into the ground.

The medics on scene determined that his jaw was broke. Everyone cheered silently and some even approached Raphael. Even Mama Jace thanked him. He stood there just glaring at Derrick. No words, no thoughts, just glares. He shook the blood off his knuckles and turned away. He grabbed me by the hips and let out a faint laugh. Whatever he was up to, it was defiantly about to raise someone's blood pressure.

"Derrick!" He called out to he broken drunk laid on the stretcher.

His head poked up to see Raphael laying his lips on mine. I was so done with life. He didn't hold back at all, and I could tell. His hot rough lips dominated my small soft ones. He put so much fire and passion in it, it felt like he meant it. Like he really loved me. My body became vulnerable. I fell into him and melted, and I think he sensed that because he pushed me against him closer, not once breaking the kiss. Jeffery is what made Raphael quit…he got a picture. Raphael broke the kiss and growled. I don't know what came over me, but his growl was the sexiest thing I ever heard. NO one could quite make that sound like he did. I was trying to catch my breath and so was he…but he was pissed before he could catch it. He walked off set and got into the limo. I turned back to Jeffrey with flushed cheeks.

"He's…done…" I managed to get out in between breath's, I smiled, and Mama Jace helped me back to the car.

"He's a keeper baby." She smiled before helping me down in and closing the door behind.

I looked over at Raphael. There was no expression on his face. I couldn't read him. I wanted to say something…but I didn't know what to say. I just looked in the other direction all the way to the airport, and all the way home.

* * *

"You guys are back!?" Donnie was surprised. He pushed his goggles up to his forehead. "My calculations were that you guys wouldn't be home until tomorrow night."

Raphael sat me on the couch, turned off the watch revealing his muscular turtle form, and stormed off into the kitchen for a soda.

I just blew a piece of hair out of my face. "As you can see our trip ended early."

He gulped it down and threw the can behind him letting it fall into the trash. "Let me tell ya Donnie, If I eva see Derrick…and I don' care where it is or what time. I'm gonna fuck him up. Period."

Raphael grinded his teeth and clenched his fists as he paced back and forth.

"Woah! Raphael who's Derrick!" Donnie began backing up. I guess he knew what was gonna happen next, cause I sure as hell didn't.

Raphael blasted the cold hard stone wall. I was amazed. That would have hurt any normal person…but then again they weren't actually normal or people. A nice dent revealed where his anger once was. I just looked over at Donatello. He didn't seem fazed at all. In the middle of it all Michelangelo and Leonardo finally decided to join us.

"Great, your back and your already punching holes." Mikey joked earning him a scowl.

"What's wrong with you hothead…" Leo stood confident with his arms crossed over his plastron.

"I'll tell ya what's wrong!" He started pounding his knuckles together. Then he pointed at me. "'Er husband showed up and things got a little bloody!"

All of the other three looked at me with questions and confused looks. I just swallowed the lump in my throat that was forming.

Leo shook his head. "Care to explain Erin?"

"Oh no need!" Raphael screamed. "She'll probably lie to ya! I had to corner 'er just for 'er to tell me." His cold glare fell upon me as I just slumped down into the couch. "I'll tell ya. The night she showed up at April's with all dat blood was the night she stabbed 'er husband."

"Stabbed her husband!? Isn't that a crime dudes?"

"I'm pretty sure that'd be assault Mikey." Donatello responded. "But continue Raphael."

"Well anyway…he wasn' just 'er husband…he was 'er abusive husband. So it wasn't really an assault…it was defense. But he showed up today an'…an' he…GRABBED 'ER! BY DA WRIST!"

I could see his anger growing stronger and brighter. I quickly interrupted in hopes of calming him down. "It didn't really hurt me."

"DAT'S NOT DA POINT! HE GRABBED YOU! LORD KNOWS WHAT HE DID THE NIGHT YOU FINALLY GOT AWAY! IF I EVA CATCH HIM OUT DARE SOMEWHERE I SWEAR I'M GONNA KNOCK HIS TEETH SO FAR DOWN HIS THROAT…"

"Raphael! Do not let your anger control you. My son's gather." Master Splinter commanded. "Tell me the source of your anger…"

"I think I'll tell the story, hot head here needs to calm down." Leonardo looked at his red masked brother out of the corner of his head. "The night Erin came to April's bloody was because she stabbed her abusive husband in the leg and ran. Well, he showed up today at her shooting and grabbed her wrists from what Raphael says he had a firm grip on her."

Master Splinter stroked his chin, then looked towards me. "Erin is this true?"

I sheepishly nodded my head.

"My child, did you not trust us with your secret?"

"It wasn't that I didn't trust you…it was that…I didn't want anyone to see how I lived my life or how helpless I was…" The water works came tumbling down and the first to come and scoop me up in they're arms was Raphael. I was surprised, but at the moment didn't care. I buried my face into his plastron.

His brothers just looked at me. At him. Then back at they're father. Raphael didn't care what they were thinking, the only thing he was worried about…was me. I thought in that moment that I really had not just one…but multiple people who actually cared for me.

I wasn't lonely anymore.


	4. 4: Airhead and Nothing Between

**Chapter 4: Airheads And Nothing Between**

I just laid in bed. Thinking about everything. But thinking was never the best to do. Everytime I started to think about one thing it'd lead into another and then all my thoughts would be jumbled up leaving me confused and depressed. I needed to get out, at least for a little while. I climbed out of bed and threw on a white t-shirt crop top and a pink floral skirt with pink keds. I grabbed my small pink handbag and started to make my way towards the exit before a goofy looking boy stopped me in my tracks. I smiled already knowing who it was. Not by the color of the watch, but by his personality.

"Mikey.." I smiled.

"Surprise! I look awesome, right?" He asked turning around, showing me his human form.

His hair was wavy and it was a dirty blonde. It kind of reminded you of some surfer the way it touched just above his eyebrows. His eyes were a piercing blue, like the Pacific Ocean. He was wearing an orange t-shirt to bring out the orange in his tribal sweater overtop. His jeans were a deep blue and they were slim fit. He had the bottom rolled over top of his brown boots. I just sat there and thought to myself wow…that's Mikey alright.

"You look adorable Mikey." I laughed and kissed him on the cheek.

He blushed a little and rubbed the place I had kissed. "Where are you going Erin?"

"Just around town. I wanted to pick a few things up. Nothing major." I actually trying to escape form my thoughts.

"Could I come? Pleaseeeee! Donnie is working, Leo is training, and Raph is sleeping."

He smiled and cupped his hands together as he leaned closer waiting for an answer. I couldn't say no to him. He was the cutest youngest brother I've ever seen.

"Yes Mikey. You can come." I grabbed his hand and lead him out of the lair.

We finally hit surface when he had said something.

"Uhh, Erin you do know I'm like sixteen. I don't need my hand held anymore." He let out a nervous laugh then flashed his perfect smile at me.

"Oh yeah sorry Mikey. I guess since you're the youngest I still see you as…."

"A little kid…I know. I get it."

I felt ashamed. Mikey was a little upset. I could tell. His shoulders were slumped and his enthusiasm was gone. It was like all life was sucked out of him.

"Sorry Mikey…let's just forget that happened. Ok? How about you and I catch a taxi and I'll take you out. After all you deserve a shopping spree since I kind of hurt your feelings."

I rubbed the top of his head as we emerged from the alleyway. He lightly pushed me away and laughed. "Alright Erin. But before we go anywhere can we eat? I'm hungry!"

"Typical." I laughed. "How does pizza and French fries sound? I know this cool stand that's just down the street." We began walking when some girl cut us off.

"Hiiiiii." Her high-pitched voice dragged on. I wanted to rip my hair out with the way she talked. "My name is Selena. What's yours?" She asked twisting from side to side. Her velvet red hair was long and wavy and partially covered her left honey brown eye.

Mikey looked at me then looked back at her. She was wearing a blue dress with nude flats.

"Uhh...my name's Michelangelo. But my friend's call me Mikey." Mikey was a little unsure.

I could tell this girl liked him, so I slipped him a couple dollars and my spare cell phone to contact me. "I'm gonna go now. Call me when you're ready to go home Mikey. Have fun." I winked at him and started down the street.

(Mikey's P.O.V)

"Wow, is that your sister?"

"I guess you could say that. I got three brothers too." I nervously rubbed the back of my neck.

"I have a brother too. But I don't know where he went." Then she let out some airy laugh.

"What do you mean you don't know where he went?" My blue eyes shifted in confusion. I know I wasn't that smart…but I always knew where my bro's were.

"Well we were walking down the street and I turned here. I looked behind me and he was gone." Once again she let out an airy laugh and played with her hair.

"Ok…" I shifted on my heels and began walking away. I really wished Erin hadn't left me here. But I looked over my shoulder to see her following me. "Why are you following me? Don't you got somewhere to go?"

"Not really. My parents went out of town and told me to walk the dog…" Then she gasped and grabbed her head. "Oh my god I forgot the dog!" She started running, it reminded me of something like Scooby-Doo. She soon turned back around and handed me a piece of paper with numbers. "Text me Mikey!"

I watched her run down the street flailing her arms everywhere. I honestly don't know who could forget a dog. I mean, I know I'm stupid…but compared to her I look like Donnie. I pushed the paper into my pocket listening to it crunch up before turning around to see Erin.

"You got her number!?" Erin leaned closer to me wearing the biggest smile.

"Uhh…yeah. But I don't plan on texting her. She's dumber than rocks Erin." I shrugged my shoulders and kept my hands in my pockets.

"That's not nice Mikey. She can't be that bad." She laughed nudging me in the arm.

"She was told to walk the dog…"

"And?"

"She forgot the dog…" I kicked a rock in front of me letting out a small laugh.

"Oh…wow…"

"Yeah…" I lifted the manhole for her as she climbed down, then I followed.

"She's still really cute Mikey." She was pushing for me to say it…I knew she was. And I was gonna say it.

"She is pretty. I like her eyes…they remind me of honey." She heard the change in my voice, even I did. I shook it off as we walked further into the sewers.

"Wow Mikey save the daydreaming for your bed."

"Oh haha!" I let her go into the lair first. Just being a gentlemen. "You know Erin I don't know why you're so bent up about me and Selena…you got major Raphael problems." I laughed receiving the silent treatment.

"There's nothing going on between me and…"

"Who?"

I bust out laughing. The one and only Raphael was standing there with his arms crossed and attitude ready to aim and fire.

"With you and Erin." I responded pushing past him back into my turtle form.

"Waddya mean dare's sometin' goin' on between us. Course not. We're friends…if ya wanna call us dat." He did a backflip and landed on the couch with the remote. "Sides notin' could go on between us. Imma turtle and she's human. It wouldn' work Mikey. Stop bein' stupid." He started flipping through channels shaking his head in disbelief. "Honestly Mikey…where do ya get dese ideas?"

I could see Erin's heart sink…but she didn't show it on her face. I looked up to see her smiling. She was trying her hardest. I wanted to hit Raphael for being a knucklehead…but that'll only make things worse. Instead I gave her a small hug.

"Thanks Erin." I pulled away and she was feeling a little better. I grabbed her things and took them up to Raphael's room, after all that's where she was staying temporarily. I came back downstairs to see the two passed out on the couch together. "Nothing…right.." I laughed throwing a blanket over the cuddling two.


	5. 5: It Always Hurts

**5: It Always Hurts**

Waking up in the arms of someone you completely trust with everything feels so nice. Except they don't know the kind of connection you've already made with them. I didn't want Raphael to know I was awake. So I left my eyes closed and thought about what Mikey had said. Maybe I do have Raphael problems…the encounters I've had with him always left me all caught up in my emotions. I could feel my heart beat start to speed up as he pulled me closer to his skin. He let out a sleepy yawn and dug his face into the crook of my neck. I gasped thinking maybe it was time I tried to wiggle out.

"Good mornin' beautiful. Tryin' to escape?" A rough laugh escaped his lips. "I'm kinda comfortable…" He then kissed the tender spot on my neck and whispered making it hard to hear him. "Aren't you?"

"Raphael…I think maybe I need to…"

But before I could finish, my breath was gone. He started sucking, biting, and licking my neck I could hardly concentrate. Every settle movement from him turned me on. I arched my back and let out a faint moan…and I guess that set something off inside him because his hands began to trail my body. He let them stop at my inner thigh then smiled.

"I think I should hit the showers…" He nibbled on my ear then jumped over the coach and disappeared.

I just turned over and snuggled into the blanket. I really needed to talk to Mikey. This feeling inside me, I only got when I was with Raphael. It was like a burning passion that was hungry for more than just a stupid friendship. It wouldn't stop until the thing I wanted was mine. But my mind kept telling me to stop it. I feel so lost. I was so close to closing my eyes again when the others emerged from they're rooms.

"Good Morning Erin."

"Morning Leo."

"What's up dudette?"

"Hey Mikey."

"Morning Erin."

"Morning Donnie."

"Good Morning Mrs. Erin."

"Morning Master Splinter."

I stretched sitting up on the couch so Mikey could join me.

"So how was your night?" Mikey asked winking at me.

"I didn't even know I was sleeping there. I just woke up and here I was." I poked my lip out in complete defeat.

"Well you asked me to take your bags up, and when I came back you and Raph were wrapped up in each other. I didn't want to disturb you, or Raphael especially…so I went to bed." He threw his arms back behind his head and relaxed. "Besides, It's not like you guys did anything…" He laughed soon stopping. "You didn't…did you?"

"What! No! Ew Mikey!" I pushed him away laughing. "Nothing happened. It's just…" I trailed off a little… "I think. Maybe. You might be right about Raphael and I." I hated seeing the pleasure on his face based on what I said.

"I TOLD YOU!" He screamed causing the others to look.

"Mikey are you ok?" Donatello asked removing the goggles from his face.

"Yeah, we knew a couple screws were loose. But we didn't think they were this loose." Leo laughed putting a hand on his purple masked brother's shoulder.

"Hey! I can be smart!" Mikey pouted.

"Yeah in ya dreams bonehead!"

We all turned to see Raphael standing in a towel around his waist. I was frozen. His muscular body had drops of water drizzling down his body. Every line was complimented greatly. I swear drool was slipping form my mouth.

"Uhh Erin, you ok?" Donnie asked me as I quickly snapped back to reality.

"Yeah, just thinking that's all." I quickly responded fixing myself.

"Yeah..staring at my body." Raphael laughed before Master Splinter reprimanded him.

"Raphael apologize to Erin for your behaviors."

"Ehh..sorry Erin." That apology wasn't sincere. Cause shortly after he walked beside me whispering in my ear. "But it's true."

I turned to look at him, and he winked at me. I couldn't stand him. "I got to change my clothes." I ran up to Raphael's room, and noticed his mask and Sai on the bed. He must have came up here before he got in the showers.

I went through my bags and grabbed a black skirt and a black short sleeved tank top that read Dope across it. I took my shirt off and my bottoms before standing there in my bra and underwear. I walked passed the mirror to grab my blue brush and started to comb the rats out.

"Stupid hair. I cut you short and you still give me hell!"

"Your give me hell standing there like dat."

Only that voice belonged to one person…or turtle. Raphael.

"Uhh…Raphael." My face turned red. I didn't know what to do.

"Relax. I came ta get my mask and Sai." He grabbed his mask tied it on. Then twirled his Sai and put them in they're holsters. "Ya know Erin…"

His voice got lower as he inched towards me. I tried to back up but my back hit the cold cement while my hands were pressed against his plastron.

"I see why you're a model..." He placed his hands by my sides and resting them on the wall behind me. "Ya got that body." He snickered before kissing my collar bone. "Like a California girl."

"Raphael you need to.."

He put his finger on my lips and shushed me. I lightly nibbled on his finger which made him pleased I guess cause a small smile escaped his lips. "Ya say you're a good girl…but I think we both know that ain't tha truth."

"What are you talking about Raphael? I never do anything bad."

"So ya never think about me. Ya know like wanting me to just push up against ya and feed your every desire." With each sentence his voice became lower and huskier.

"N-No..Raphael..I-I haven't."

His tongue licked the lobe of my ear slowly. "Dat's a lie Erin." He whispered before pushing me up against the wall. His hands were now on both sides of my head. Before I could react his lips were against mine. The heat radiating off of him made me want to melt. He kept pushing on me harder and harder. It didn't really hurt. It's just his body was so muscular compared to mine. I jumped up and wrapped my legs around his waist not once breaking the kiss. I didn't want to. He threw me on his bed before licking his lips. He planted the most roughest kisses all over my neck.

"Raphael..." I gasped as he bit a tender part of my neck.

"You're gonna be saying that a little louda soon." He laughed and gave me one last kiss before leaving. "But I gotta go train before Fearless gets a little mad." He kissed my cheek and met the others.

I slipped my clothes on and came downstairs where I found no one but me, Master Splinter, and Mikey's phone. Mikey's phone. I decided to have a little fun, and texted Selena.

M: Wanna go out tonight around 7? We can go out to dinner. Maybe to that new pizza shop.

S: Sounds fun Mikey. I thought you'd never ask. But until then, what are you doing?

I had to think quick what would Mikey be doing? Playing video games.

M: Playing a video game. What about you?

S: I'm eating a bowl of floofie cereal. It's quite good.

M: Sounds…weird. But ok. I can't wait for tonight.

S: Me either(: I'm gonna go get ready, you know how long it takes girls. Haha.

M: Alright, see ya later.

S: Byeeeee(:

I threw the phone on the couch and curled up on the couch.

"My child. You worry about your feelings towards one of my sons." Master Splinter used his walking stick as support and sat down on a small part of the couch beside me.

"No Master Splinter. I'm fine." I lied, and he knew.

"You think you can lie?" He let out a short laugh. "Mrs. Erin I have four sons. I can see behind lies. Now tell me child, what is your trouble?"

I sat up rubbing my left arm. "Well I'm so confused, and this is probably gonna give it all away but, he always seems so angry. But when he's with me he just has so much fire and passion. I don't know what to do. I don't want him to lash out one day and hurt me. Like Derrick."

"Ahhh..I see. Raphael can be a force to be reckoned with. Trust me, I know. But his heart is filled with love, his anger may blind him but he will never intentionally hurt someone. Unless it's a threat to his family. Believe me Erin when I say you may be broken, but he wants to fix you."

His words felt so true. I believed him. I nodded my head and gave him a reassuring hug. "Thank you Master Splinter. I guess that cleared some things up."

"You're welcome my child."

An hour flew by and the boys came back. I'd have to say none of them were drenched in sweat like they usually were. They all smelt good like the ocean.

"Why do you guys smell like the ocean?"

Raphael grunted in anger. "We got our shells waxed by a bunch of foot ninja's because Fearless Leader 'ere was worried about Karai!"

"That's not how it happened and you know that Raph! We couldn't just let her get away. She was part of they're plan."

"To distract you! And it worked!" Raphael's rage exploded. Everyone could see it.

His chest grew and minimized as he huffed and puffed. His whole body was tens and you could see it in his muscles. I wanted to help him relax, but I didn't know how. I just put my arms on his forearms. I rubbed them while my head relaxed on his back. Instantly his anger was gone. I didn't even do anything but touch him.

"Wow Erin. Whatever you did calmed him down…" Mikey's eyes widened.

"I wouldn't be so sure Mikey." Raphael growled. Before storming off up to his room.

Even though I stayed there temporarily it was still his, and I let him use it when ever he needed it.

"Maybe you should go talk to Mister HotHead." Mikey suggested, but I didn't want to.

"Yeah Erin. He might listen to you better than anyone else." Leo agreed as Mikey began pushing me towards his room.

I got to the door, and lightly knocked only to get flat out rejected.

"Go away!" He screamed followed by a loud crashing.

Now my blood pressure was risen. "I'm just trying to help!" I screamed through the door.

"Well I don' want ya help princess!" Raphael screamed followed by another loud bang.

I pushed through the door, and there was pieces of glass and wood. Raphael was punching his dummy. The stuffing was basically beat out of him, it was a lifeless dummy. But Raphael kept going, let hook, right hook, the anger burned more and more with each hit.

"Didn't I tell ya I didn' want ya help!" He screamed. I'm not gonna lie I jumped.

Sweat poured off of him. He wiped it off and began throwing every combination. I guess he was so mad he hadn't noticed that one fist went passed the dummy and into the concrete wall.

"FUCK!" He yelled only to punch the wall again with the same hand.

"Would you calm down!" It was rare that I got angry, but when I was. There was no way in hell to stop me.

"WHY SHOULD I? HUH PRINCESS? WE LOST BECAUSE OF LEO'S INTREST IN KARAI!"

"YOU KNOW IT'S NOT LIKE THAT! LEONARDO WOULD NEVER DITCH YOU GUYS FOR SOME GIRL! HE KNOWS THE THREAT SHE POSES TO YOU AND HE WAS TRYING TO STOP IT! GOD! YOU'RE SO BLINDED BY YOUR OWN ARROGANCE AND ANGER, YOU CAN'T EVEN SEE THAT YOUR OWN BROTHER WOULD GIVE HIS LIFE BEFORE LETTING YOU DIE!" He was so unbelievable I ended up punching him in his left shoulder. But I kinda figured that didn't hurt him.

No words were exchanged he just looked at me. It's amazing what one person could do to you. He slowly advanced towards me and before I could react his lips were on mine. This kiss was like nothing I've ever felt before. It was heat, it was passion, it was an apology. He pulled me closer wanting to feel my exposed skin. I melted into him. I let every felling I ever go. I pushed myself against him causing him to be up against the wall. Soon, the roles were switched he had my up against the wall. His right hand was traveling up my thighs. With every inch his hand moved closer, my lust for him was growing as well. This encounter with him wasn't like the others. He pulled away in disbelief.

"I-I'm sorry Erin. I don' know what took ova' me." He rubbed the back of his head feeling ashamed.

"Don't be sorry…" I whispered before kissing him again.

He lightly pushed me away and traveled to his bed. He just sat there with his head in his hands. "Ya don' understand…" He slid his hands down his face.

"What don't I understand Raphael?" I sat on top of him straddling my legs around him.

"I can't do dis. I wouldn't be able to control myself. So, dis…" He pointed his finger and switched it between him and I. "Can't happen. I woun't let it happen. I'll end up hurtin ya or losin ya…so what's the point in tryin?" He picked me up and sat me down by the door. "I gotta go apologize to Leo. See ya around Erin." He walked out.

I peeked out the door to see him talking to Leo. They ended up laughing and hugging. I'm glad that they're all happy. Then there's me. I don't think he realized that leaving me is hurting more than being with me. I know he can be a hard head, but I can handle him. I know I can. I threw myself on the bed crying my poor pathetic eyes out. I'm always alone. It's always me. I don't know why I even open myself up.


End file.
